I am a lucky bastard...

Every now and then, when I surf around the web, I see an positive, perky post at social networks or blog. People share the good things and moments in their life, everything seems to be just too perfect, at least for my taste. If I read them at all I can't help but being just a little bit annoyed. I wonder if they only share how perfect their lives seems to be. Don't they have moments where lives just suck, they are hesitant or they simply feel miserable? I am a firm believer that life balances itself. I believe there is no courage without the fear, there is no happiness without the misery, there are no gains without the pains!

The past week for me was kind of summarized things for me. I started the week feeling a bit lost in this new chapter in my life. I wasn't sure if I had the right priorities in my life. Was I doing the right things, meeting the right people, had the right message or was I just wasting my time with meaningless meetings?

But then a chain of events have started happening. They did not just happened out of the blue. I would like believe that when people meet with similar, sometimes identical, intentions and/or emotions magic happens.

Let me go thru these meetings one by one;
Last December (year of 2014) I met a new colleague, a professional public speaker/motivator, during Christmas Party. We exchanged a few necessary polite phrases and briefly told each other what we do and talk about. A few weeks ago, beginning of February he contact me and asked to meet over a cup of coffee. This Wednesday,  the 18th, I met him and we talked intensively. When he told me more about himself and his intentions I was blown away not only what he wanted to do but also how similar our background stories were. Here I was sitting with this guy from Sweden and almost listening to myself. He wanted to arrange a whole day event at a school, the 31st of August 2015, where 10-20 maybe 30 public speakers, motivators would be there to share their experiences to the students. The purpose was to help the students to change their point of view, the way they think, the way they perceive the world around them. The idea was to hopefully them to think there was hope and it was up to them to take the chance. So we went from idea to action. We called-to-action in our FB-group page already a number of colleagues told us they also would like to be part of this. I was so energized!

The day after my energizing meeting with my friend I got to have lunch with my best friend. I had the feeling that we don't get to meet so often so I made a list of things that I would like to ask, say and share during this encounter. So when we finally met and took a bit of food and sat down. We started talking which soon turned into laughters. I got to tell my best friend how much I appreciated the company and how our friendship enriched my life. I was/am and always will be thankful to have had the chance to met a person that I can proudly call a true friend of mine. I wish everyone had a friendship where your friend is also your witness, your conscious. I was smiling the rest of the day, the rest of the week, I still am smiling.

I also got to pay quick visit to a couple of friends to pick up presents for the "school visit" I will be doing when I am in Tanzania. My friends took time and money from their lives to buy notebooks, pencils and pen sharpeners. I am blessed to have friends like them...

So yesterday, Friday the 20th of February, started like an ordinary day. I met a newly found friend and hopefully a future partner about diversity, it was time for another lunch with another good friend of mine. He had a lot of ideas but most importantly questions. He intentionally pushed me to for more focused and sharp answers, we agreed to meet in a few weeks to continue to work on my offerings in my new life.

After lunch, we had the 2nd meeting with "Diversity Awareness Jury", I am going to tell you more about this in a later post. Here I was among people I admire, I look up to. I looked around the table and the meeting was intensive. Many ideas, discussions and laughters and many of them just recently met. We have a long list things to do and I was filled with hope. We managed to book a new date for the next meeting and I took off to another meeting with a CEO whom have showed character and passion for diversity. We discussed intensively for an hour and agreed to meet again. We both were in an agreement that we could do more together.

In my car, during my drive home, Friday afternoon, I realized how much of a luck bastard I was. I was pleased with my priorities. I was doing the right things, meeting the right people and my message was getting more sharpened, more focused. To top all of these, recently we initiated an activity to find 60+ job opportunities.

If you've read this far, yet another positive and perky post, I would like to remind you that I am firm believer that life balances out itself. In a few days I am going to embark a journey, to climb Mt Kilimanjaro, at 5896 meters, Uhuru Peak. It's going to be tough and even at times painful. No pain no gain, right?

A "thank you" note to my heroes...

It’s almost 20 years, ago and I still remember it very clearly as if it was yesterday.

30^th of January 1995 I stepped into Telia’s reception Magnusladulåsgatan 2. It was a Monday and my first day at my first job in Sweden. I was going to start as a PC technician (PC support) to help Telia employees. My employment as on a trial basis and if Iproved myself than may be than I could be employed.

I was full of energy, hopeand very nervous at the same time. 20 years later I am grateful to those people who welcomed me. Ulf, Stefan, Lars, Christoffer, Anders, Tommy, Mats, Kari and everyone else who showed their greatness and courage by accepting me for who I am and how I was. 

I am grateful that they explained to me, in some cases several times what I should do, how I should do it, what I could and couldn’t say. I am grateful that they corrected me when I used the wrong words and/or phrases so that I learnt Swedish so quickly. I am grateful that I from day one felt that I was part of group. I gained self confedence and I felt proud of being part of my team.

So, today, 7301 days later, I would like to take this opportunity to thank all of them, my heroes. If it wasn’t for them I would not been where I am today and I don’t mean only professionally. 

Telia was and has been a wonderful company to work for and it was a great school. Telia gave me, and many other employees, opportunities to grow both professionally and personally. Less than 3 years after I started as a PC technician, I took the job as Regional Manager for all PC technicians in Stockholm area, with more than 160 employees and consultants.

I know that when you work hard and you are doing your job well, you’re kind to your customers and colleagues and you show that you have ambitions you will be recognized. Sooner or later you will get chances like I did. A hero will step up and give you chance and when he or she does, grab it and do it to best of your abilities, and than some more!!! More heroes will be around as your colleagues, customers and they will give valuable feedback and advice. I always and will continue to embrace any feedback and take it granted that all feedback were given to me with the best of intentions.

A word of advice, DON'T wait 20 years to thank your heroes like I did!! :-)

I couldn't help myself going also by the restaurant we used to go for lunch. The name is still the same and I hope to get together with my firends and heros soon...


Today I am more convinced than ever that what I am trying to do is what I am meant to do. If you want to know more about my new challenge, Diversity Intiative and want me to share my story, Min resa and/or want to have a Diversity Awareness workshop pls contact me.

Do I have more of CCC or am I deceiving myself?

Captain Ergin's log (Earth calendar 2014, October 24, 10:16 CET)

My day started rather interesting this morning. The events were all very normal events, nothing really unusual about them. The interesting part was how I handled them, so let me walk you thru my morning

- around 07:00 CET I get up, breakfast and coffee, like any other normal day at home.

- 07:30 brush my teeth and thinking about what I will do today, looking at the thermometer, 6,2 degrees centigrade, 76% humidity, the trees wave as the wind blows outside.

- 07:41 I turn on my laptop to prepare for my meeting which will start at 09:00. I see an e-mail from the person I am going to have the meeting, which he sent 07:23 that he had to prioritize other things so he had to cancel the meeting.

- 07:42 I confirm his e-mail and propose a few new dates and times to setup a new meeting. If this was say 6 months ago I would have been frustrated but not this morning.

It's some where here I started re planning my morning and decided to go for a power walk. I put on

clothes and shoes and at 08:03 exactly I was outside. I knew I was prepared for the meeting and there wasn't much else I could do. I instead decided to take the chance to something I needed to do, my training for Kilimanjaro and went for it. So far so good, as I was warming up I was more aware of the weather, wind and humidity. This wasn't the the first time I was out for a walk or a run in this kind of weather. This was the FIRST TIME I was going for a walk in this kind of weather LOOKING FORWARD to it. I had a smile and I was already feeling energized. In the forest, along my path there were a lot of water, which I used to have an excuse for not going out this kind of weather, but today I saw them as challenges and opportunities to train my balance and jumps. My feet got a little wet and it was not a problem at all.

During the walk which lasted around 1 hours and 40 minutes I had a lot to think and remember a quote from Robin Sharma, "At the heart of mastery lives consistency." This was the first of the three C's I was thinking of. Was I more consistent than before. I have been committed to my training sessions and psychically feeling great.

I also started thinking about if I was taking my decisions more consciously,  the second of three C's. I recently changed my path in life, trying to find my way in a for me totally new arena and find my "right to exist". All the decisions I have been taking the last few weeks, were they more conscious or were they taken randomly. I have met a lot of very interesting and inspiring new people. I also discovered that many of the people I know had ideas and thoughts I wasn't aware of. This awareness was it because of me or was it gonna happen any way?

Was I more courageous?  The third of the 3 C's. A few days ago I have delivered my first all way workshop for a customer in Visby, Gotland. I started with "Min resa" and continued with "Diversity awareness workshop". I was happy how the whole day went and so was the customer, a group of 30 HR specialists. A few minutes before I was going to start, I turned on the song I listen to get into stage mode and being stage ready. I felt great and happy, to be among 30 people I never met before, all experts in their profession.

I recently heard "we don't get more courageous, we get better at showing our courage". These few words reminded me that I wasn't more courageous, I was getting better at showing my courage in some circumstances. The fact that I have been preparing for a long time, by reading many articles, watching countless Youtube films, discussions with experts and friends, did help me to ground myself.

With this experience I will have the courage to book meetings with potential customers and/or partners.

May be I have a dash of more CCC, consistency, making conscious decisions and better at showing courage. Or may be I am just deceiving myself, only time will tell.

A penny for your thoughts on "circle of life" and "gravity"

In a matter of days the season change is very obvious where we live. As I went out for a walk yesterday, the 11th of October 2014, the rich colors were all around me. I was surrounded with with thousands shades of brown, yellow and green. I realized I was at the front seat and observing two (2) profound rules of life as we know it.
1- Gravity, as the mild wind was giving the last gentle push needed for leafs to their last dance as they slowly and elegantly flew around and softly land on the ground.
2- Circle of life, as the falling leafs, branches and trees were providing the means necessary of all the other living things to feast, nurture and regenerate life.

 I took a picture and posted it in my fb-page, with some comments of CIRCLE OF LIFE and GRAVITY. I knew that there were more things to be looked into and elaborated. I needed definitions as well as a way to explain my thoughts on these phenomenon. So at home I googled for it and found these definitions;

Cirlcle of Life: Nature's way of taking and giving back life to earth. It symbolizes the universe being sacred and divine. It represents the infinite nature of energy, meaning if something dies it gives new life to another.

Gravity: The natural force of attraction between any two massive bodies, which is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them.

It started thinking about of these two profound powers and rules would also apply to relations in our lives. These rules govern everything in the infinite universe as we know. We now know that out there wild explosions of giant stars give birth to a nebula which is the birth place of many new stars planets, moons and so on. Everything goes in circles, the galaxies, solar systems, moons. I was now thinking about what and where our own role is, and our place in this infinite nature. And how about how everything in the universe is one way or another effected by gravity and celestial bodies circle around each other.

It was hard, if not impossible, to try to make a good analogy and I decided to give a try anyway. I hope you can bear with me just a little longer and share your wisdom with me on these powers and rules.

If that's the case that circle of life and gravity play role in our relations I end up with many questions and very few answers? Here are some I would like to know;

• Around whose gravity (love and care) you're circling around? Who is your sun, if you were the earth? Who is your earth if you were the moon? Is the attraction of your masses (gravity) in perfect balance?
• As the moons gravity give earth it's axis tilt which make seasons possible, how about your seasons and circle of life? Do you have emotional winters, summers, springs and autumns? Do you enjoy each and everyone of these seasons?
• If you were the planet and end up in the gravity of a black hole, result of a giant star explosion, which sucks everything and nothing, not even light can escape, are you able to detect that destructive force in time? And let's say do the discover that fact you're pretty close to this "emotional black hole relation" what do you do?
• If our relations were in fact also under the influence of circle of life, falling leafs and dying trees, do they provide what's needed for new relations in time? If one relation, whether it's a love relation or friendship, if you loose or choose to leave the relation, do "infinite nature of energy" equip us to go on to new relations? If it's so when we break up and/or end a friendship, is to be perceived as a good thing since we both will have access to "infinite nature of energy" to build new relations and friendships?
• If you eventually find your celestial body and you both happily revolve around each other, are we still at the mercy of universe's violent powers? When a new larger body shows up with more gravity than you could ever imagine, how does that affect the gravity and attraction in your relation?
• If you were the planet like earth with one moon and you think that's fine. If you were like Jupiter and/or Saturn with tens of moons with different properties, what does that mean to you? 
  
• Sometimes destructive forces give birth to a beauty we all admire. Saturn's rings are result of collision of former moon(-s) and asteroids. As the light is reflected they put up a beautiful show. Do a destructive relations end can give birth to a beauty we can admire eventually?

I am no longer sure if I make any sense at all and that's fine. You may be also thinking why do I go these lengths in my effort to find answers to these two phenomenon, "circle of life" and "gravity". Well, it's fun, developing and enriching to analyse the whole concept and also I like good metaphors ans analogies.

No matter what, everyone of us have the ability and responsibility to our own gravity (love and care). We also are smart and clever enough to understand, employ and maintain our own circle of life (notion that if something dies it gives new life to another) in our relations.

A sensitive and caring significant other and/or friend should always be in a place which is far enough so have his/her trust, comfort, freedom is always present and at the same time feel his/hers unconditional "gravity". He/she also knows at whenever he/she is in need of your gravity, you'll be there in an instant to support and to listen. He/she is always prepared to be there for you when you need his/hers gravity and he/she is happy knowing your circle of life is in perfect balance.

So, a penny for your thoughts. Feel free to join in and share your wisdom with me and others who bother to read this. Have a great Sunday! 

I am more optimistic than ever before...

This week, the be precise week 40 of year 2014, I have had the pleasure and privilege to visit two (2) schools in my home county, Södertälje. I met young minds whom have future plans and a lot of questions. They see a lot of opportunities in the future and for them diversity is a given fact of life. They daily interact youngsters at their own age from different cultures at school and they play online games with friends all around the world. They also had environmental and social awareness which was impressing in these trying times.

My task was to explain for them what is meant to be an entrepreneur in a way to that they could relate to it. I saw that they have many ideas and dreams for their future and some had started to work with their business plans.

I am optimistic for the future. I think in the future we don't need to explain for enterprise management teams how diversity can enhance product development, sales and profitability.  I am sure that the workplaces will be more diverse and including and the simplest things we fight for will be considered as obvious. I am convinced that these leaders and entrepreneurs of the future will strive for sustainable business practices and thereby will have the competitive edge against the enterprises whom are merely looking the keep the status quo.

I am optimistic for the future. I would like to believe that there's a thing called karma and hope that all the good deeds will somehow bring back some good fortune to those whom have been unselfish. I am sure that people around those unselfish ones recognize the desirable qualities and support them in any way they can. I am convinced that if they had the means, time and opportunity they would like to join forces to change the world for the better.

I hope to continue to visit schools and meeting youngsters because it's also very refreshing and energizing for me. The feedback is great and the questions are though. I am looking forward to my next assignment which is at Husbygård school the 14th of October 2014. :-)

Have a great day!

Är jag också en så'n som...

Till och börja med, VI är jag och några av mina vänner... Häromdagen träffades vi, i samband med återträffen för IFL VT-10. På väg hem efter middagen var jag både nöjd och lite fundersam.

Vad mycket vi tar det givet i våra liv, både privat och professionellt. Det var bra med det, lite eftertänksamhet skadar väl inte, fram tills idag.

Jag hälsade på UF-lärare på Torekällsgymnasiet i Södertälje. Vi skulle träffas för första gången och när jag kom fram mötte jag två av hennes kollegor. I deras rum var såg jag en bild och en kollegorna sa att han gick bort nyligen. Jag tittade på bilden lite mer noggrant och såg att en av deras kollegor gick bort bara ett par veckor sedan, vid 43 års åldern, pga en hjärtinfarkt. Jag kunde inte säga annat än; "Livet är ju banne mig inte rättvist", "Beklagar sorgen".

Själva mötet gick bra och jag ska tillbaka tisdagen den 30:e september för att hälsa på föreläsa en av UF-klasserna. Jag tog mig till ett affärsmöte i Farsta, framme något tidigare och passar på att skriva dessa rader. Det är lika bra att skriva och publicera denna inlägg tänker jag. Vad som helst kan hända när som helst.

När jag, efter mitt möte ska sätta mig bilen för att köra till Arlanda, för att sedan sätta mig i flyget till London, ska jag ringa till några av mina nära kära. Man vet aldrig vad som kan hända.

Är det så att jag också tar människor givet i mitt liv? Det kanske jag gör, kanske inte. Jag får helt enkelt tänka på det oftare. Idag blev jag påmind av det faktum att det som inte får hända, kan hända och det händer. Det bästa sättet att hantera nog är att dela sina tankar och funderingar med sina kära, nära, barn, vänner och kanske till och med kollegor.

Det var allt från Farsta denna gång. Hade fortsatt trevligt. Jag hoppas att se några av dig/er på min föreläsning vid biografen Zita på måndag, den 29:e september. Hej så länge! Allt gott!!!

...storleken spelar ingen roll...

"Det finns inga stora handlingar. Det finns bara små handlingar med mycket kärlek" har Moder Teresa sagt. Jag läste denna citat, jag läste det igen och var tvungen att lägga undan boken ett tag. Det slog mig att jag, förmodligen som många andra, planerade och genomförde stora handlingar (in english BIG GESTURE) eftersom jag levde i tron att dessa räknades mer. Plötsligt, denna citat, dessa 13 ord förändrade hela mitt tänkande. Det var en s.k. paradigmskifte för mig.

I våra relationer med våra barn, med våra käraste, med våra föräldrar och på jobbet försöker vi utmärka oss med stora handlingar, det var iaf vad jag gjorde. Visst gjorde man även små handlingar MEN jag levde i tron att dem gjorde ingen skillnad. För att vara extra tydlig levde jag i tron att små hanligarna gav INGEN poäng och stora handlingarna gav MASSOR av poäng. Självklart förenklar jag det hela för att göra det hela lite mer begriplig.

I våra relationer har vi alltid specifika områden med utmaningar och vi försöker adressera desssa specifika områden i vår strävan att finna lösningar. Målet att hitta samförstånd. Vi förklarar, diskuterar och sedan kommer vi fram till en gemensam förståelse. Det är så även i arbetslivet i våra uppdrag. Vi diskuterar priset, innehållet, tidplanen, resurserna/budgeten och visst helheten är viktigt och vi förmår inte riktigt att lyfta oss till en nivå då vi diskuterar helheten. För att göra det ännu krångligare finns även andra saker som aldrig nämns och självklart ingår dessa i våra uppdrag. Ingen nämner dessa och på något sätt känner man vid leveransen, visst höll vi prisnivån, innehållet var bra, tidplanen var också bra och resurserna/budgeten var i linje med prognosen MEN det är inte riktigt bra ändå.

Nu förstår jag varför det är så. Längst vägen, hela mitt liv hade jag missat massor av "poäng" eftersom jag levde i tron att små handlingarna räknades inte. Det viktiga inte VAD jag gjorde utan, det viktiga var mina intentioner. Det skulle alltså räcka lång med små handlingar MED MYCKET KÄRLEK och OMTANKE. Det kan till och med vara så att dessa små handlingar är egentligen betyder MER än stora handlingar alltså ger bättre utdelning. För första inser jag att  storleken spelar ingen roll...

• stora handlingar = existerar inte
• små handlingar MED mycket kärlek = resultat, poäng, utdelning! :-)

Jag vet inte, om du har orkat att läsa så här långt. Jag förstås raljerar en hel del och är efter mina 48 levnadsår är väl medveten om att de små handlingarna betyder mycket, med ett villkor, små handlingarna måste innehålla MASSOR av KÄRLEK. Det tog ett bra tag för mig komma fram till det. Jag vill gå nu ännu ett steg och hävdar att varje dag börjar vi från NOLL. Vi ska vara medvetna om vikten att göra varje handling så kärleksfull så möjligt. Det kan handla om koka té/kaffe, frukost, städning, tvätt eller hur vi tittar på TV tillsammans hemma i soffan. På jobbet kan det handla om hur vi bemöter varandra, våra hälsningsfraser, hur/var/när/med vilka vi fikar, snackar eller inte fikar, snackar.

Det är vi själva som skapar det tillstånd vi lever i, inte någon annan. Det är vi som bestämmer hur vi bemöter våra barn, våra käraste, våra föräldrar, våra kollegor på jobbet och våra kunder. Låt Moder Teresa visa vägen till dig. Läs igen hennes citat, denna gång på engelska för att undvika en potentiell missförstånd; "There are no great acts. There are only small acts done with great love".

Med detta nyvunna kunskap kunde jag läsa vidare min bok. När jag skrev min journal blev det ett långt inlägg. Jag lade till ett antal påminnelser till mig själv i almanackan för att läsa just dagens inlägg några gånger under dem kommande veckorna. :-)